


Top 5 Actual and Legitimately Canon Ways The Town Of Riverdale Is Actually Spooky And Magical

by heroic_pants



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Magical Realism, an ask i got that i wanted to share, don't ask about the drive in, the river has its reasons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-19
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-20 22:40:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10672233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heroic_pants/pseuds/heroic_pants
Summary: "No one was surprsed to hear the Blossom kid had gone missing, and later been found there. “The river has its reasons.” Is a local saying very hard to understand if you’re new."A list of the five most unusual, yet barely discussed, reasons Riverdale is not a normal place, even as its residents try to convince themselves it is...





	Top 5 Actual and Legitimately Canon Ways The Town Of Riverdale Is Actually Spooky And Magical

**Top 5 Actual and Legitimately Canon Ways The Town Of Riverdale Is Actually Spooky And Magical**

 

 **1) Pop Tate is Immortal -** No one talks about it, no one can be sure - but the diner was built in the 1940s and leased by a charming old black man, who loved to cook. He seems to have had a son, even though no one can remember him having a wife or a child? But, it’s obviously not the same man in the grany photos on the wall, with the same glint in his eye, still making the best burgers this side of Canada. That would be impossible. Pop Tate looks so much like his father, though…  
  


 

 **2) Sweetwater River is not a normal river -** “of course it’s a normal place!” the residents all say. “I was driving to to shops but I meant to find my way to the River, and just sit by the riverbank for an hour, silent tears running down my face for a reason i don’t remember, staring at the birds.”   
  
“I found the doll my father threw away before he left, the one I loved more than anything, at the banks of the river and it’s normal that it looked as clean and new as it did thirty years ago”

Young people are drawn to it, like a lovers lane, but no one asks what they’re giving in return. No one was surprsed to hear the Blossom kid had gone missing, and later been found there. “The river has its reasons.” Is a local saying very hard to understand if you’re new. 

 

 

 **3) The Big Oak Tree Near the Library that Weeps Blood Occasionally:** Well, sure, Veronica, maybe the kind of fancy trees in NEW YORK that you’re used aren’t like this, but jeez it’s just a tree. And that’s a natural phenomena, obviously. It’s been there for years, why are you so interested in one tree literally it’s so boring, we’ve ridden our bikes past it for years.  

 

 

 **4) You Can Check In But You Can Never Leave:** it’s not true, obviously. There isn’t some arbitrary force in town that stops certain people from leaving, and allows others to leave and return. We all wanted to stay in this small town, and we’re not at all envious of people who leave, even knowing they come back, eventually. This is such a sweet little town. Who would want to leave. 

 

 

 **5) Crimson-Hair Peak:** The Thornhill manor is definitely haunted by several generations of Blossoms. but if you’re gonna put a graveyard in your grounds, _Otto Blossom,_ then you really have yourself to blame, don’t you. Almost no kids have ever been for a sleepover there without feeling unnatural cold, or hearing a high laugh in an empty room, or seeing a figure in an old white dress out of the corner of your eye. That says a lot about how many kids still attend parties there.

 

 

**6) BONUS: The Drive In Land**

It’s important for reasons you don’t understand, you’re six, you’re ten, you’re fifteen, you’re too young, don’t worry about it. Of course we can go there, we have to go there, it likes crowds. I mean, the owners do. 

I promise I’ll tell you when you’re older, but you kids don’t need to worry about it. Enjoy the movies. They’re building a shopping centre in its place. It likes crowds. No, you heard me wrong: the owners do.   

The sheriff’s office is doing everything they can to solve the murder of this kid, really. What? What are you suggesting? That he was sacrificed as part of an ancient ritual to the old god Yog-Sothoth who lies beneath the old Drive-In land, so that he will continue to bless us with fortune and prosperity so long as we sacrifice a child to him every twenty years? That if we don’t he will break free and consume the town?? 

That really is ridiculous. You kids watch too much Buffy, or whatever.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was a different thing to my actual fic, which is weird because the town is more normal there but i really believe it's genuinely weird as it is here - technically not a fic, an ask, but it was so fun to write i thought i would publish it here :)
> 
> i'm @pantsaretherealheroes.tumblr.com
> 
> shoutout to ManyColouredDays for the inspiration :)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [the fun of sifting through the ashes](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10676637) by [nosecoffee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosecoffee/pseuds/nosecoffee)




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